Category Archives: While You Were Asleep

A Window Into Your Soul

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While this is partially in response to the lovely Lindsey D’s rant about the patently absurd nature of romantic comedies and fictional love stories in general, it serves more as an intellectual exercise, another opportunity to explore the depths of film and television as an extension of and projection of our mortal desires. Granted fiction is fiction and the distinction has to be made, but the exploratory nature of films cannot and should not be explored. Other than exploring individual desires, they also have a keen ability to expose the Ethos of the age and watching films/televisions shows from decades past can offer a window of exploration into the zeitgeist of the times. Continue reading A Window Into Your Soul

Schumann: What to do about kids sexting?

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The Atlantic, along with NPR have both vocalized their opinions on a controversial sexting scandal involving high schoolers in Virginia. NPR has the courtesy not to attempt to explain the “causes.” but naturally Hanna Rosin at The Atlantic can’t resist the opportunity. The incident came to light when several naked photos of minors showed up on Instagram, prompting a police investigation, a bunch of smartphones taken from kids, and a pile of aimless ambiguity. Continue reading Schumann: What to do about kids sexting?

Schumann: Text Her First — Part I of 3-Part Series


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In response to the 10th installment of Off The Trax podcast, the wonderful presenters debated about the ‘text back’ after an initial date. While I’m not particularly experienced in this specific interaction, as a living, breathing male with a penchant for analytical approaches to topics like this, I’d like to further explore this occurrence.

The ‘text back’ action is the equivalent of the ‘call back’ for a job you applied for — a limp-wristed attempt at receiving feedback for a performance you’re unsure of. How this process is executed can only indicate two things, both possibilities unpalatable.

First, the feedback approach. Sending a text as a follow up, offering reinforcement for everything your body language already said during the initial interaction can only serve to indicate a lack of confidence from the sender.

I had a lot of fun last night.Continue reading Schumann: Text Her First — Part I of 3-Part Series

Schumann: Seduction, Addiction and Fox Mulder

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Note: While much of the material here is based on Californication’s protagonist, viewing the show is not necessary. Hank Mulder’s character is only used as it serves as an excellent example to illuminate these theories and observations. Fiction is very often a window into our own psyches – displaying fears, desires and fantasies, not only of the author but of the generation the show/book/movie targets as well. Fox Moody is a brilliant piece of fictional engineering, not only for the exploration into seduction the character offers (and the archetypal Rake that he is), but how his position is a fantasy personified. Additionally, the following interpretations only pertain through the beginning of the fifth season. Opinions may change regarding some of the material presented, however the character assessments should be solid through the end.

Note II: Prior to watching Californication, I had heard a good bit of talk about how the show’s protagonist was a “sex addict,” and how this paralleled Duchovny’s personal battles with sex addiction. Not only is this incredibly wrong, but it obscures the show’s brilliance in individual examination.

“Life imitating art huh! Weird how that works!”
 No idiot, Moody is the farthest thing from addicted to sex. He may very well get around like the Tupac track, but he never shows symptoms of addiction. Repetition compulsion maybe, but no way is he a sex addict (alcoholic, probably). Moody’s perpetual and seemingly constant sexual pursuits (wrong word, he rarely is the ‘pursuer,’ a point I’ll examine shortly) are the result of a lifestyle that comes along with being a modern, self-destructive Rake, and stem from other ‘issues’, and attempts to fill a ‘need’ in the only way that seems attainable. Continue reading Schumann: Seduction, Addiction and Fox Mulder

Schumann: Drugs, Sex and Middle-Age


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Note: The following only applies to the first season. I am unable to defend this theory beyond that point, however I have a feeling this shoe will continue to fit.

Recently, I had exhausted every episode of Pretty Little Liars on Netflix, and was looking for another filler to take up the hours between attempting to sleep falling asleep drooling on top of my laptop. On a recommendation from one of my couch-surfing, analytical-approach-towards TV watching compatriots, I began the journey into Californication. (Yes, I’m aware it started 7 years ago. Give me a break, I don’t own a television.)

One thing was immediately shocking to me: this show displayed so much symbolism, so much aspiration and so much potential for after the fact justification of not pursuing the same aspiration it displays, that I had to make certain I hadn’t mixed up my anti-depressants with my hallucinogens stash again.

It’s a brilliantly crafted plot, not so much the obvious struggle and (Don’t spoil it!) inevitable resolution between protagonist > lost target of desire he seeks to get back by pushing her away/simultaneously pursuing her but the way in which it depicts the image of Hank Moody. Continue reading Schumann: Drugs, Sex and Middle-Age

Schumann: The Illusion of Understanding


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Disclaimer: By no means would I declare or consider myself a scholar of any legitimate caliber, and I promise you finding fault with me is pretty easy. It’s for those reasons exactly that I felt compelled to write this.

I’m sure in some way, shape, or form nearly all of you have heard of the Socratic Method. No, this isn’t a boring rant about the origins of philosophy you missed, but an excellent demonstration to serve an otherwise obvious point.

The Socratic Method is described almost universally as some sort of “ancient discourse” involving a teacher asking a student questions that require generative responses to provoke ‘deeper reflection’ or something similar.

Not only is this completely wrong, missing the purpose entirely, but it’s indicative of far worse than just being a small, ‘harmless’ piece of misinformation. Continue reading Schumann: The Illusion of Understanding

Schumann: How to be proud of your body! Like you for you


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Good, I see you fell for the clickbait title. Buckle up.

Between listening to elevator music and Prince’s Greatest hits on loop, I strayed off the beaten path and flipped though pop culture radio stations. Imagine the Stoic look on my face when I discovered Meghan Trainor’s “All About That Bass.”

After a brief internal debate about the meaninglessness of human existence, I opted not to steer into oncoming traffic but spent the remainder of the day pondering why such a song exists.

Grab the rum.
No, all of it. We’re going to need reinforcements. Continue reading Schumann: How to be proud of your body! Like you for you